Total Nerd Messed Up Virginity Loss Stories In Comic Books  

Zack Howe
8.6k votes 2k voters 185.5k views 11 items

List Rules Vote up the virginity story that makes yours look aggressively tame.

Sex in comic books can be a little deviant. Sometimes superhero sex stories are overt and freely depicted, but sometimes subtle innuendo is all the readers get. Even more difficult to glean sometimes is how those how comic book characters lost their virginity in the first place. It is hard to imagine, as some of these superheroes are likely bad in bed. How could anyone take Rogue's V-Card without getting drained of life in every possible way? She would be quite a dangerous partner in the boudoir. But it happened, as it did for others.

Sometimes a character will have a sweet love story and lose their virginity in the most romantic way possible, like Aquaman. On the flip side, there are characters who lose their flower in some of the creepiest sex scenes imaginable. What follows are instances in which a character or two lose their virginity under some seriously suspect circumstances.

1 1,125 VOTES

The Scarlet Witch And Quicksilver Partake In Forbidden Love

The Scarlet Witch And Quicksil... is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Messed Up Virginity Loss Stories In Comic Books
Photo:  Marvel Comics

That's right, Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver straight up "Lannistered" all over the place. But it gets even worse. In this storyline, there's a strong implication that Wolverine is their father, having slept with their mother around the same time Magneto did.

Well, during one of Wanda and Pietro's dalliances, there's a bestial man peeking through the bushes. That man may very well be the father of those twins engaging in... crimes of passion. His peep show is a little much, but... at least he looks angry about it?

1,006 119
Is this messed up?
2 1,117 VOTES

Archangel Deflowered A Teen In Front Of Her Mom

Archangel Deflowered A Teen In... is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Messed Up Virginity Loss Stories In Comic Books
Photo:  Marvel Comics

Uncanny X-Men, indeed. 19-year-old Paige Guthrie, AKA Husk, loses her virginity to Archangel, who is likely in his 30s at the time. Inexplicably, this deflowering takes place in the air as a group of X-Men (and Guthrie's mom!) look on in insufficient bemusement.

There's just so much wrong with this, especially the lighthearted nature in which it's depicted as if something like this is anything but horrific. In fact, it is one of many reasons why Chuck Austen's run of Uncanny X-Men is not remembered fondly.

912 205
Is this messed up?
3 927 VOTES

Hal Jordan Corrupts A Fellow, Younger Green Lantern

Hal Jordan Corrupts A Fellow, ... is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Messed Up Virginity Loss Stories In Comic Books
Photo:  DC Comics

Hal Jordan sleeps with a fellow Green Lantern named Arisia, an elf-like alien woman who doted over him for quite some time. That sounds fine, right? Well, when she was doing all that doting, she was actually a child – something comparable to a 14-year-old human (though she looked even younger) – and through her desire to be with Hal, she subconsciously used the power of her ring to age rapidly into a grown-ass woman. Hal took note of that and slept with her not long after. 

636 291
Is this messed up?
4 872 VOTES

Superman Lost His Virginity As A Kid To A Brainwashed Girl

Superman Lost His Virginity As... is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Messed Up Virginity Loss Stories In Comic Books
Photo:  DC Comics

There's a messed up 1977 Superman tale: DC Super-Stars Giant #12, "Don't Call Me Superboy." In this crazy adventure, Kal-El's robot teacher from Krypton arrives on Earth and puts Clark through a series of tests. After one of Clark's classmates, Misty, learns of his identity, they sleep together. Shortly thereafter, however, she is killed by MARAUDING SASQUATCHES.

Clark is enraged, on the verge of killing one of the Bigfoots, but he stops because he does not kill. And that was the final test. The Kryptonian robot teacher appears to praise Kal-El for not killing and reveals that Misty was actually from a neighboring town; this robot took her and brainwashed her so he could manufacture this love affair with Clark. Fortunately, Misty wasn't actually killed (though she did unwittingly sleep with a man), and Clark actually bumps into her on a plane years later on which she's a flight attendant. 

This story is often overlooked because it's assumed Clark is a virgin before Lois, but if this is canon, he most certainly was not.

559 313
Is this messed up?