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The 14 Weakest Comic Book Supervillains You Could Probably Beat Up

March 11, 2021 303 votes 38 voters 1.3k views14 items

List RulesVote up the villains you wouldn't need superpowers to beat down.

The most memorable comic book villains are those who challenge our heroes on every fundamental level, including physically. But what about the weakest DC villains, or the weakest Marvel villains - who would rather run away in fear than get in a fistfight? After all, not every human on the face of the Earth is given tremendous athletic abilities, and the same goes for the made-up worlds of comic books.

You won't see Abomination, Doomsday, or Thanos on the list. No, we're talking about the more feeble side of the "supervillain" spectrum. People like the Trapster and Calendar Man. How could Ten-Eyed Man win in a fight if he sees out of the fingertips he needs to use for punching? Doesn't Kite Man's kite kind of get in the way in a one-on-one fight? Also, we're pretty sure you could just step on Mister Mind and call it a day. Let's roll through some comic book supervillains even you could probably beat up if push came to shove.

  • Photo: DC Comics

    Thanks to comics, author Tom King, and the Harley Quinn animated series, Kite Man (or is it Kite-Man?) has become a bit of a cult favorite in the past few years. "Kite Man. Hell yeah," has become a bit of a rallying cry for comic book readers in the know, as this obscure DC villain has seen his star rise due to his vital role in "The War of Jokes and Riddles" from King's run on Batman. But that doesn't mean good ol' Charles Brown (that is his real name, Peanuts be damned) is more than a regular guy with a kite on his back.

    Brown is just a normal person, after all. And though he is capable of gliding and flying thanks to his big honkin' kite, he's not all that capable in a fight. He isn't meant to be a highly dangerous supervillain, and that is cool with us. These are comic books after all, and we don't need each and every villain trying to be the next Darkseid. 

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  • Photo: DC Comics

    What is the least-helpful superpower you can think up? Go ahead, we'll wait... Got it? We doubt it is as useless as Philip Reardon's particular power. The guy sees through his fingertips. That's it. The eyes in his head don't work, either. This isn't the kind of power that will help you in a fight. How exactly would you go about using your hands?

    Extrasensory overload aside, one punch with either of those hands would render them pretty inert, yeah? He better hope it's never too cold in Gotham City as he wouldn't be able to wear gloves to keep warm. Well, he could... but he wouldn't be able to see anything with any of his 10 eyes. He is rendered useless when his hands are covered with bags in Batman Eternal #44, so we'd put our money on the Dark Knight in a one-on-one fight any day of the week, thank you very much.

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  • Daredevil really did get the best "supervillains" in the 1960s. For example, we have Manuel Eloganto, AKA the Matador, who was introduced in 1964's Daredevil #5. He literally was a bullfighter that turned to a life of wrongdoing after an incident where he became distracted while being booed for his cruelty towards bulls, which took his attention away from the animal he should've been trying to avoid. Eloganto turned to the crowd to call them "peasants" and "brainless ones," which gave the bull an opening to mangle his body.

    After being rushed to the hospital, Eloganto vowed "revenge upon all mankind" for the cruelty he suffered at the hands of a bull he chose to face off with. Eloganto is naturally a swift guy with solid reflexes, but there is just no way he can stack up against the Man Without Fear. And his subsequent Marvel Comics appearances catching the ire of Hawkeye and US Agent have ended just about as well as you would expect.

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  • 4

    Egghead

    Marvel Cinematic Universe fans might be a little more familiar with Egghead than they at first might think, thanks to his blink-and-you'll-miss-it appearance in Ant-Man and the Wasp, but that film gets the essentials of the character down. Elihas Starr is just an average man with a huge brain who does little to no exercise whatsoever. Sure, that film changed him from a supervillain into a sympathetic figure, and they completely got rid of his egg-shaped head, but the basics are still there. 

    Whether he's going up against Ant-Man, Hawkeye, Spider-Man, or any of the other Avengers, Egghead better hope whatever scheme he's come up with will work out because if it comes to blows, he's a goner. Sure, he's a super-genius, but according to 2010's Avengers Assemble #1, he weighs 320 pounds at a height of just 5 feet 11 inches. And it's not like he spends his free time pumping iron to create that mass.

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