Names The Whitest Mayo Baby Names You Could Give Your Child  

Jacob Shelton
697.2k votes 47k voters 821.5k views 141 items

List Rules Upvote the babies who will grow up and ask to speak to your manager.

What’s up with white people and their super douchey names? When you give a child a white-sounding name, be it Tanner or Fiona, it’s almost like you’re giving them license to walk around acting like James Spader in Pretty in Pink. Guess what? No one likes that guy!

When you hear some white boy names you wonder if the kid’s parents were trying to will him into being the captain of a lacrosse team by calling him Carter, or if they really just enjoy the way such a sharp name falls out of their mouths. The one advantage white girl names hold over white boy names is they don’t immediately inspire fear in everyone who hears them, although names like Maisie and Audrey do put the child in a state of suspended animation for the rest of their lives. But who cares as long as the names are cute? And very, very white.

Vote on the whitest baby name ever, and if you see your name on here, don’t get upset; just don’t give your baby a super white name. 

list ordered by

1
10,681 5,704
Stephanie Barrans added Paisley

2
2,387 1,207
Michelle Sablan added Brody

3
1,626 796
whatsthisitch added Colton

4
11,904 6,548
Hunter

5
9,487 5,211
Shaylee Kay Farnam added Peyton

6
10,945 6,072
Rezin Nichole Secrest added Brayden

7
3,203 1,748
Jessica Miller added McKenzie

8
10,787 6,227
Tanner

9
12,076 7,056
McKenly

10
904 471
JeffSebasovich added Raegan

11
1,350 755
hannahdalaba19 added

12
3,207 1,946
Jessica Miller added Easton

13
1,555 914
Michelle Sablan added Brad

14
2,496 1,557
Jessica Miller added Weston

15
486 241
BHinz added Parker

16
1,761 1,106
22bekgruber added Lakynn

17
9,190 6,224
Chase

18
6,481 4,402
Shaylee Kay Farnam added Mason

19
1,350 851
22bekgruber added McKinli

20
8,712 6,012
Aiden

21
787 477
SavannahBoggs added Jake

22
8,662 6,124
Maisie

23
937 589
Shey Austin added Becky

24
8,047 5,782
Logan

25
7,670 5,521
Carter

26
7,521 5,480

27
7,642 5,605
Tucker

28
7,903 5,834
Raleigh

29
708 450
aiden.tracey added Ligma

30
7,939 5,910
Claire

31
7,190 5,357
Brett

32
7,166 5,509
Natasha Machell added Chet

33
1,217 872
montgmae0 added Maelynn

34
6,949 5,381
Kaitlyn

35
360 212
BHinz added Austin

36
1,308 983
Krystal Soo-jeong Oh added Grace

37
6,356 5,183
Camden

38
895 687
montgmae0 added Sophie

39
5,454 4,607
Abby Hopper added Kelsey

40
5,419 4,587
Cole

41
672 508
Brody Robbins Christensen added Autumn

She a red head

42
5,867 4,978
Tristen

43
5,829 4,951
kamat033 added Emily

44
732 568
22bekgruber added Maylee

45
5,555 4,778
Audrey

46
4,959 4,308
Owen

47
4,576 4,005
Jennifer Simpson added Harrison

48
1,252 1,053
ColinBoddy added Lexi

49
5,630 5,014
LeeAnne

50
5,043 4,541
Dylan