Names The Whitest Mayo Baby Names You Could Give Your Child  

Jacob Shelton
658.8k votes 44.4k voters 780.8k views 141 items

List Rules Upvote the babies who will grow up and ask to speak to your manager.

What’s up with white people and their super douchey names? When you give a child a white-sounding name, be it Tanner or Fiona, it’s almost like you’re giving them license to walk around acting like James Spader in Pretty in Pink. Guess what? No one likes that guy!

When you hear some white boy names you wonder if the kid’s parents were trying to will him into being the captain of a lacrosse team by calling him Carter, or if they really just enjoy the way such a sharp name falls out of their mouths. The one advantage white girl names hold over white boy names is they don’t immediately inspire fear in everyone who hears them, although names like Maisie and Audrey do put the child in a state of suspended animation for the rest of their lives. But who cares as long as the names are cute? And very, very white.

Vote on the whitest baby name ever, and if you see your name on here, don’t get upset; just don’t give your baby a super white name. 

1
10,007 5,361
Stephanie Barrans added Paisley

2
1,758 884
Michelle Sablan added Brody

3
8,934 4,974
Shaylee Kay Farnam added Peyton

4
11,234 6,289
Hunter

5
10,401 5,841
Rezin Nichole Secrest added Brayden

6
1,080 536
whatsthisitch added Colton

7
11,661 6,791
McKenly

8
2,726 1,524
Jessica Miller added McKenzie

9
10,264 6,005
Tanner

10
2,813 1,721
Jessica Miller added Easton

11
942 527
1517491523460 added Liam

12
503 243
JeffSebasovich added Raegan

13
1,372 823
1516730991424 added Lakynn

14
2,160 1,359
Jessica Miller added Weston

Hipster Baby Names for Boys

15
1,026 617
1516730991424 added McKinli

16
8,810 6,052
Chase

17
6,129 4,230
Shaylee Kay Farnam added Mason

18
1,136 721
Michelle Sablan added Brad

19
8,335 5,853
Aiden

20
8,386 5,937
Maisie

21
7,369 5,359
Carter

The Scariest Animals in the World

22
7,714 5,647
Logan

23
7,254 5,340

24
7,666 5,661
Raleigh

25
7,347 5,452
Tucker

26
7,698 5,768
Claire

27
627 399
Shey Austin added Becky

28
6,933 5,225
Brett

Things That Only the Youngest Child Will Understand

29
495 305
SavannahBoggs added Jake

30
6,885 5,342
Natasha Machell added Chet

31
6,709 5,240
Kaitlyn

32
987 713
montgmae0 added Maelynn

33
6,155 5,031
Camden

34
1,094 836
Krystal Soo-jeong Oh added Grace

35
202 104
BHinz added Parker

Things Your Mother Told You... That She Was Right About

36
5,280 4,474
Abby Hopper added Kelsey

37
712 545
montgmae0 added Sophie

38
5,247 4,462
Cole

39
5,686 4,852
Tristen

40
5,646 4,828
1489356996842 added Emily

41
5,380 4,659
Audrey

42
555 422
1516730991424 added Maylee

The Very Best of the Drunk Baby Meme

43
4,799 4,194
Owen

44
4,417 3,889
Jennifer Simpson added Harrison

45
5,473 4,881
LeeAnne

46
485 377
Brody Robbins Christensen added Autumn She a red head

47
4,872 4,424
Dylan

48
5,012 4,560
Forest

49
4,441 4,063
Brett

50
4,857 4,454
Meghan