Names The Whitest Mayo Baby Names You Could Give Your Child  

Jacob Shelton
659.5k votes 44.4k voters 781.4k views 141 items

List Rules Upvote the babies who will grow up and ask to speak to your manager.

What’s up with white people and their super douchey names? When you give a child a white-sounding name, be it Tanner or Fiona, it’s almost like you’re giving them license to walk around acting like James Spader in Pretty in Pink. Guess what? No one likes that guy!

When you hear some white boy names you wonder if the kid’s parents were trying to will him into being the captain of a lacrosse team by calling him Carter, or if they really just enjoy the way such a sharp name falls out of their mouths. The one advantage white girl names hold over white boy names is they don’t immediately inspire fear in everyone who hears them, although names like Maisie and Audrey do put the child in a state of suspended animation for the rest of their lives. But who cares as long as the names are cute? And very, very white.

Vote on the whitest baby name ever, and if you see your name on here, don’t get upset; just don’t give your baby a super white name. 

1
10,013 5,371
Stephanie Barrans added Paisley

2
1,771 888
Michelle Sablan added Brody

3
8,944 4,977
Shaylee Kay Farnam added Peyton

4
11,246 6,293
Hunter

5
10,408 5,849
Rezin Nichole Secrest added Brayden

6
1,089 541
whatsthisitch added Colton

7
11,667 6,797
McKenly

8
10,276 6,007
Tanner

9
2,733 1,529
Jessica Miller added McKenzie

10
2,820 1,724
Jessica Miller added Easton

11
948 530
1517491523460 added Liam

12
508 247
JeffSebasovich added Raegan

13
1,377 829
1516730991424 added Lakynn

14
2,168 1,362
Jessica Miller added Weston

Hipster Baby Names for Boys

15
1,031 620
1516730991424 added McKinli

16
8,818 6,054
Chase

17
6,137 4,232
Shaylee Kay Farnam added Mason

18
1,143 725
Michelle Sablan added Brad

19
8,340 5,857
Aiden

20
8,396 5,938
Maisie

21
7,375 5,363
Carter

The Scariest Animals in the World

22
7,719 5,649
Logan

23
7,261 5,342

24
7,671 5,664
Raleigh

25
7,353 5,455
Tucker

26
7,705 5,769
Claire

27
631 402
Shey Austin added Becky

28
6,937 5,228
Brett

Things That Only the Youngest Child Will Understand

29
500 309
SavannahBoggs added Jake

30
6,890 5,343
Natasha Machell added Chet

31
6,713 5,243
Kaitlyn

32
992 715
montgmae0 added Maelynn

33
1,100 838
Krystal Soo-jeong Oh added Grace

34
6,159 5,035
Camden

35
208 107
BHinz added Parker

Things Your Mother Told You... That She Was Right About

36
5,284 4,477
Abby Hopper added Kelsey

37
716 548
montgmae0 added Sophie

38
5,252 4,463
Cole

39
5,690 4,854
Tristen

40
5,650 4,831
1489356996842 added Emily

41
5,382 4,662
Audrey

42
558 424
1516730991424 added Maylee

The Very Best of the Drunk Baby Meme

43
4,803 4,196
Owen

44
4,421 3,891
Jennifer Simpson added Harrison

45
5,476 4,884
LeeAnne

46
489 378
Brody Robbins Christensen added Autumn She a red head

47
4,875 4,427
Dylan

48
5,016 4,562
Forest

49
1,086 945
ColinBoddy added Lexi

50
4,444 4,065
Brett