Chauffeurs And Limo Drivers Describe The Most Ridiculous Things They’ve Seen While Driving People

If you drive people around for a living, especially as a limo driver or a chauffeur, you see all sorts of outrageous situations. Stories from limo drivers and chauffeurs vary in tone from wildly entertaining to quite shocking, because different people act out in different ways when they have money to burn. Since they interact with the same people most maids and housekeepers work for, limousine workers and personal drivers witness many of the same ridiculous and out-of-touch behaviors one typically associates with the rich and famous.

Wild chauffeur stories involve getaways, illicit activities, and even a few celebrity sightings all worth reading about - which many a driver have happily shared on Reddit. And what might otherwise be a bumpy ride gets a little extra cushion thanks to the funds involved.

Limo drivers and chauffeurs see a lot of strange stuff - things not even the partition can hide.

Photo: MFer Photography / flickr / CC-BY-ND 2.0

  • When They Tip Well, It's Basically A Paycheck

    From a Redditor:

    I received $5,000 from a guy I had for four days, $1,500 from a one night gig, $200 to take a guy's mistress to dinner, and he paid for the meal.

    I think the "best" one was $800 for finding eight bottles of Dom at 4:30 in the morning on a Monday morning ($100 a bottle tip).

  • They (Legally) Had To Narc On A Client

    From a Redditor:

    [I] had a former client who loved to recreationally use cocaine as a party favor. I told him that I would have to terminate the run if he continually used it in the back of the vehicle (I could get in short-term trouble for his use). He didn't feel the need to adhere to local laws, so I called the police and asked them to pull me over and run a check with all the passengers in the back of the vehicle. The partition was up, so they didn't hear the conversation. They obliged, clients were arrested, I went home early.

    There are a few reasons why it worked like that. Mainly, the guy is an assh*le. So were his friends that night. Second, I could lose my license and driving authority if I got pulled over and that was found in a search. But, legally, I am a mandatory reporter.

    After 9/11 there has been a tremendous strain put on the transportation industry, which includes incidents like this. I am often "encouraged" to look the other way in certain situations. But it's with people I can trust to a certain degree. I'm not about to lose my livelihood, something I've worked for years to build, for a disrespectful cokehead who has no cares for himself, much less me.

    Anybody who says they wouldn't do the same is either uneducated, or very naive. Neither of which would have a job like this very long, if they made it this far in the first place.

  • A 'Wild' Ride For Sure

    From a Redditor:

    The Girls Gone Wild crew... [was] in town a few years ago during Spring Break. I was driving an RV and it was going on in the back. I really didn't see much, but the opportunity to see more was there. There was a guy filming, and two guys doing the do. There were five girls. The guy filming eventually ended up in the action later.

    On a side note, the guys were complete assh*les. Very demanding, no tip, and we had a hard time getting them to pay their bill. 

  • The Great Green Day Escape

    From a Redditor:

    I was driving the band Green Day from their concert to their private jet, and we had a crazed and possessed fan following us. I had their body guard sitting beside me giving instructions on when to speed, when to weave, where to turn, etc, etc... until we finally lost him. Good thing there were no cops around.

  • Where'd The Other Passenger Go?

    From a Redditor:

    I picked up five people one time and drove them around for a casual hour. About halfway into the trip I looked in my rear view mirror and noticed there were only four passengers sitting at the back. I kept driving while asking myself where could that fifth person be?

    There he was, laying flat on top of the roof of the limo gazing at the stars. Could have been dangerous for him if I had to jam on my breaks for some reason.

  • The Governator Likes A Good Cigar

    From Redditor /u/octaneN:

    Arnold Schwarzenegger was in Hannover/Germany to visit the CeBIT fair. While on the way to the fairground, he noticed that he was out of cigars. So he told the whole motorcade (about 15 cars, including police and motorcycles) to stop by some tobacco store. The leading car was a bit confused with the order which lead the pack into the central pedestrian area.

    So there we were, about 15 cars, lights flashing, standing in front of a tobacco store in the middle of downtown with hundreds of people watching while the Terminator was getting some cigars.