There are bad customers, and then there are bad tattoo customers. While dealing with a difficult client is one thing, dealing with lousy customers while you're trying to put permanent ink on their body creates a whole new, potentially life-ruining problem. And that's exactly what these tattoo artists horror stories from Reddit get into - the trials and tribulations of those who work in ink and all its terrible trends.
Not only do they see all sorts of different people and personalities, artists must get up close and personal with customers and the bad tattoos they want on their body forever. Each of these tattoo artists' stories of their worst customer encounters get very extra - from bodily fluids to screaming to requests for penis maintenance, it's all there. And the very worst tattoo parlor customers have a little of everything.
Although it makes sense people may get nervous and not be their best when getting a tattoo - especially if it's their first time - these stories highlight the importance of understanding what you're getting into, and what's getting put on you... and it's always good to remember that tattoo artists make mistakes too.
From Redditor /u/parfait_surprise:
My husband has a tattoo of Waldo on his taint. I think it was done in Seattle. I'm sure the tattoo artist did not enjoy his night.
Second Time's The Charm
From Redditor /u/el_monstruo:
I remember my friend's sister wanted a tattoo of a scorpion on her pelvic region being that she was a Scorpio. She was immensely afraid of the pain in getting a tattoo so she went a got super drunk before doing so and had her two brothers and I go up with her and a friend. The artist knew this and refused to do the tat because of her condition for a number of reasons including...
Legal. She could've sobered up and said she didn't ask for it or was not in her right state of mind.
Health. Alcohol thins blood which may make you bleed more which could cause issues with the person getting it.
Quality. The possible extra bleeding and being that drunk people aren't the stillest bunch in the world, the tat would probably come out looking like crap.
She makes a big fuss about it saying she knows what she wants, she isn't drunk blah, blah. She mentions something about the artist missing his chance to get to see "this p*ssy'"and flashes him and her brothers and I saw too. This tattoo parlor also had a pool table so she goes and knocks all the balls in the pockets thinking it was a pay table (it wasn't) and mentions something about them having to buy more balls.
The older brother finally snatches her up and carts her out while she screams something like "f*ck it, I didn't want one anyway" on the way to the door along with other vulgarities. The younger brother and I were apologizing to the others there and they were "like it's cool just get her home safe and if she stills wants it when she sobers up tell her to come on back."
The next day the brothers told her about her actions and how embarrassing it was for all involved and she felt pretty bad about it so she went back, while sober, and apologized and got over her fear and got the scorpion tattoo from them.
Getting Threatened... For A Job You Don't Do
From Redditor /u/cats_are_my_friend:
A man who threatened me with physical violence because I wouldn't change his piercing jewelry. I'm not a piercer. I don't do that. But he was angry about that and wouldn't leave and I was actually afraid. That was probably the worst.
Sh*t And Run
From Redditor /u/RubyTuesday:
I was working on top floor of tattoo studio, tattooing a bloke early one Saturday morning. He goes pale and says he needs to pee quickly [so I] point him in the direction of the bathroom.
Ten minutes later I get worried he has passed out on the toilet (it happens), go to walk down the stairs. I notice a super gross stench, look down at the stairs and see tiny little piles of diarrhea on each step.
Guy has sh*t himself on the way to the toilet and run away, never saw him or his money again!
Thank god for apprentices.